Good introduction, using some thing shocking to reel people into your speech. Although I think that you could use a question as part of your intro, it seems alright, as long as there is EMPHASIS. Also, near the end, it doesn't really tell me what will happen is we don't stop using nuclear power, this is crucial in persuasive speeches, especially if you are against the topic. Don't use imagine twice in the conclusion, find a thesaurus. You might have to rewrite your conclusion, because it'd too run on, and also because you don't really answer your question you posed the end, making it seem like there is more to your speech. Many good examples and connections to people's inner feeling of wanting to protect.
Nice introduction, it reveals the topic clearly. I like the way of how you wrote the intro with two questions. In addition, this speech was full of back up for your arguement. This indicated your viewpoint. However, too much information made me think this was a expository speech. In my opinion, it's neccessay to illustrate some of your perspectives in your information paragraphs. Secondly, compare with your intro, your conclusion didn't show your viewpoint clearly. Nonetheless, the information was really interesting. It has changed my view of nuclear energy.
Good introduction, using some thing shocking to reel people into your speech. Although I think that you could use a question as part of your intro, it seems alright, as long as there is EMPHASIS. Also, near the end, it doesn't really tell me what will happen is we don't stop using nuclear power, this is crucial in persuasive speeches, especially if you are against the topic. Don't use imagine twice in the conclusion, find a thesaurus. You might have to rewrite your conclusion, because it'd too run on, and also because you don't really answer your question you posed the end, making it seem like there is more to your speech. Many good examples and connections to people's inner feeling of wanting to protect.
ReplyDeleteNice introduction, it reveals the topic clearly. I like the way of how you wrote the intro with two questions. In addition, this speech was full of back up for your arguement. This indicated your viewpoint. However, too much information made me think this was a expository speech. In my opinion, it's neccessay to illustrate some of your perspectives in your information paragraphs. Secondly, compare with your intro, your conclusion didn't show your viewpoint clearly. Nonetheless, the information was really interesting. It has changed my view of nuclear energy.
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